WARNING: This post will contain MY religious views and opinions. There is most likely going to be swearing.
Before we start, I should probably mention that no one has died. Yet. It's a possibility. That was a joke. I think. Well. Probably.
It came to my attention that I have lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of quirks and idiosyncrasies (was that right? Did I use it in the right context? I don't knowwwww). Anyway, I have some weird and unexplainable fears and superstitions. I am convinced that they are a product of past lives.
Now, those of you that know me well enough, know that I'm Anglican Christian BUT you will also know that I am probably one of the worst Christians ever. Well, maybe not worst. I haven't murdered anyone yet.
However, even though the Devil may welcome me to Hell with open arms and then realise he made a horrible mistake by letting me sit in his seat (I ain't getting up - that shit is comfy), I do mostly believe in a core fundamental of Christianity - love (which is probably why I don't know how to butt out of my friend's problems). Although, I do take a lot of beliefs from other religions, such as reincarnation, and the idea that there could be more than one god (imagine a bunch of elderly beings sitting around a poker table arguing with each other (I know gambling is a sin but I never actually said they were playing poker)).
Back to reincarnations. Basically, I had past lives. Lots, if the list of fears and oddities are any indication. I mean, I have an irrational fear of ALL natural water, and I don't even go in the deep end of a swimming pool if I can help it. I can swim. That's not the problem. So. Being me, I decided I must have drowned in a former life. It's entirely possible. Right? I mean how else do I explain it? Oh, and did I mention that lakes, canals and water with plants in are the worst? I mean FUCK don't make me go near anything like that ever. PLEASE. Another weird thing about me is the fact that I find it physically difficult to share food. I mean, how odd is that? Once again, those of you who know me that it is ABSOLUTELY impossible for me to be starved. BUT. I food guard. Like a dog. How bad is that?! And once again, my only explanation is that I must have been starved in a past life... Maybe I was a slave? Or mistreated? It's odd, right? Just wait for it... I have this weird kinship with the World Wars. For some reason, the history and the sacrifice always hits me hard. I don't know why; maybe I'm just really empathetic, but somehow (in my mind) I have decided that I was involved in the war in some way. I could have been a nurse or even joined the army in World War II. For all I know, I could have been a man. I literally have no clue. Like usual.
Talking about gods. I full on believe there must be different gods up there (wherever there is), that basically argue about which humans get which guardian angels and all of the angels are so confused which is why so many people get all mixed up and injured. I also firmly believe that there must be some gods that like to have a little fun and say "their lives are going really well, let's just give them a parking ticket!!" but some gods like that everyone is doing so well so they're all "wow!! Honey, you work those mismatched clothes and shoes!! Turn that into the next fashion trend!! No one will laugh at you today!!".
So. Yes. I have some weird ideas of religion. I may be Christian, but that doesn't mean I wholly agree with all the views. But that also doesn't mean that I'm a Christian in name only. I have my own views and maybe sometimes I agree with atheism but it's made me who I am. Does this make sense to the outside world? No. It does not. But it makes sense in my head. I may not be accurate. I may even make things up half the time. I could practically have my own religion (there is a Star Wars religion after all). But it's me. Deal with it.
Shenaya xx
P.S. here's a photo of Raffi in a toy box.
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